a nervous looking piggy bank looking at a stack of coins representing anxiety after your fiance asked for a prenup. we offer los angeles couples therapy for millennials to address financial anxiety.

If your fiancé just brought up getting a prenup and your stomach dropped a little, you’re not alone. It’s probably why you clicked on this blog, right? As couples therapists, we’ve worked with many clients who’ve had that same reaction.

It's easy to associate prenups with worst-case scenarios or imagine it as someone saying, “I don’t trust this to last.” But in reality, a prenup isn’t about preparing to leave—it’s about planning to stay.

And more importantly, it’s about protecting both of you.

**What a Prenup Really Is**

A prenuptial agreement is a legal document that outlines how finances, property, and assets will be handled during a marriage. Most people assume it only kicks in if there’s a divorce, but that’s just one piece of the puzzle.

A prenup is a roadmap for how you’ll approach money in your marriage even if you stay together forever.

That includes:

a couple looking at financial documents together representing how couples can talk about money to have a stronger relationship . we offer couples therapy in california & florida for millennials to have better relationships and less financial anxiety.

How you’ll handle joint vs. separate accounts
How you’ll manage debt
What happens if one partner stops working to care for children or aging parents
How inheritances or family businesses will be treated
What happens financially in the event of illness or death

These are important conversations every couple needs to have, and a prenup ensures you're not just having them now, but documenting your shared agreements for the future.

Prenups Are Not About Trust, They’re About Clarity

Love may be the foundation of marriage, but the legal system still treats marriage as a financial and legal partnership. When you marry someone, you’re entering into a contract. This is true whether you draft your own (a prenup) or allow the default laws of your state to decide how assets and responsibilities will be handled.

So if your partner is asking for a prenup, it’s not a sign they expect things to go wrong. It may actually be a sign they’re thinking ahead, wanting to protect what you’re building together, and interested in being fair and clear from the start.

Prenup Conversations: A Test of How You Communicate About Money

a couple sitting on a bed talking representing how to have hard conversations about money before marriage with the help of a los angeles couples therapist.

Here’s something we tell couples all the time: how you handle prenup conversations says a lot more about your relationship than the prenup itself. In fact, couples who have collaborative, productive conversations about the contents of the prenup often stay married!

Money is one of the top sources of conflict in marriage, not because couples don’t care about each other, but because they often avoid or mishandle financial conversations. The prenup process brings those topics to the surface, giving you an opportunity to:

Talk about your hopes and dreams for your financial life together
Practice honest and respectful communication
Understand each other’s financial values
Build trust through transparency
Set up systems that work for both of you

Couples who approach this process collaboratively and with curiosity tend to navigate future conversations more smoothly.

Prenups Are Be Fair Because You Both Have Representation

A true prenup isn’t one-sided. Each person should have their own attorney to ensure the agreement is fair and fully understood.

Your lawyer is there to represent your interests. Their lawyer will represent theirs. The goal isn’t to “win,” it’s to come to an agreement that respects and protects both partners.

When done right, a prenup can actually strengthen your relationship by encouraging open dialogue, reducing anxiety, and creating a shared understanding of how you’ll move through life together.

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Daniella Mohazab, AMFT

Final Thoughts On Prenups from a Couples Therapist

If your fiancé is asking for a prenup, take a deep breath. This doesn’t mean they’re planning to leave. It may actually mean they care deeply about your long-term stability, and they want to build something strong and sustainable with you.

From a couples therapy lens, we view prenup conversations as an opportunity for connection, not conflict. With intention and mutual respect, these conversations can bring you closer, not further apart.

Need support navigating big conversations like these?

While we can’t give legal or financial advice, we offer couples therapy in Los Angeles and specialize in Gottman Method couples therapy, which is grounded in decades of research on what makes relationships last. Whether you're preparing for marriage or approaching sensitive topics like money, we're here to help.

Schedule a free consultation today to connect with a therapist who can support your relationship for the long haul.