How To Heal From Sexual Trauma

Sexual trauma can be a particularly violating experience. It robs people of their sense of power and agency. It affects their relationship with their body, sex, and intimacy. It shifts and impacts loving relationships. And it can create powerful feelings of guilt and shame. In the struggle after sexual trauma, it's normal to wonder if recovery is possible.

Healing From Sexual Trauma Is Absolutely Possible

The good news here is that recovery from sexual trauma is definitely possible. The bad news is it sometimes takes a long time. Not for everyone; some people have built-in resilience that protects then from PTSD and other lasting effects. But many people do struggle with the impact for months or years.

The Three Things Every Survivor And Loved One Should Know About Sexual Trauma

It Wasn't Your Fault

This is the biggest issue we hear from survivors; believing you somehow invited it or failed to prevent it. This belief can delay healing. Please hear it from us, licensed therapists with years of experience working with survivors: it was not your fault. You did not invite it. You did not fail to prevent it. You are a victim of a crime.

It Wasn't About Sex

This trips some people up, but sexual assault is not about sex. Sexual assault is about power and control. When you are the victim of sexual assault, your power and control are taken away. That's what makes it so traumatic. Thinking it's about sex makes it really confusing.

You Are Up Against A System That Protects The Perpetrator

Patriarchy and systems that support people in power make it difficult for survivors to be believed, protected, and supported. From social attitudes to policies and laws, you're facing a lot of invalidation, shame, and blame. Victims of other kinds of crimes don't have to deal with this kind of oppression. If you feel like others are questioning your reality, you're in the majority of survivors. This is true even if you don't choose to report or press charges.

How To Heal From Sexual Trauma

Recovery looks and feels different to everyone. Here are some of the most common ways we've seen people heal.

Find Ways To Reclaim Your Power and Autonomy

Because sexual trauma is about having your power taken away, the most important thing is for you to feel in control again. On your own timeline, do things that make you feel strong and in control. This might be with your wardrobe and self expression, with what you eat, what you do with your free time, etc.

While other people might encourage you to report what happened or take specific steps, you have to be in control. You might need to remind them of that. Sometimes more than once.

Make Peace With Your Body

This one can be hard and take a lot of time. It's not uncommon for survivors to struggle with their relationship with their body. After all, their body was the scene of the crime. From over-showering to avoiding bathing, all responses make sense. Some people find it difficult to eat; others can't stop eating. Some people dress in baggier clothes, others more revealing. It's common to stop wanting sex; it's also common to want tons of sex. Some people may over-exercise to reclaim control; others might stop exercising. Some people might become ultra health conscious; others might stop seeking medical care. For those with eating disorders, dysmorphia, dysphoria, OCD, or body-focused repetitive behaviors, you might see your symptoms get worse. It's important to make sure your safety and physical health are cared for, even when it's difficult. Enlisting the help of mental health professionals might be critical.

Expressive Arts Therapy

Though not enough money has been devoted to studying the impact of expressive arts therapy, the research we have is encouraging. Anecdotally, we've seen it work some magic. Through art, music, dance, and movement, you can express things that words fail to capture. You can communicate the personal and the universal in a cathartic way. You can do this on your own or through structured therapy groups.

Group Therapy For Sexual Trauma

Sexual assault can be a particularly isolating experience. It's too easy to feel alone and unsupported. Attending a group can help de-isolate you, normalize your reactions, and give you hope for recovery. 

Sexual Trauma Therapy

Talking to a trained sexual trauma therapist who has experience helping people like you can make a world of difference. Even if you have great friends and loved ones, the neutrality of therapy can be important. Other people might have their own strong emotions, reactions, or suggestions about what to do. Sexual trauma therapy is a place for you to figure out how to move forward without other people's voices drowning yours out. It's also a place where you will be believed, heard, and understood.

EMDR As Sexual Trauma Therapy

EMDR therapy can be a powerful tool for helping eliminate flashbacks, triggers, and distress when thinking about what happened. Though it can be intense and take time, we've seen it help in huge ways. You can do EMDR as a primary treatment model, or as an adjunct treatment in addition to other therapies.

Couples Therapy For Sexual Trauma

If you're in a partnership, your experience has likely impacted your relationship. A trained and experienced couples therapist can help you and your partner navigate this difficult topic. With successful couples therapy, you can decrease trauma symptoms, feel closer to your partner, and have a satisfying sex life again.

Start Your Healing Journey With Sexual Trauma Therapy In California or Florida Today

Whether you're ready to embark on your healing journey solo or with a sexual trauma therapist, we commend your courage. It's not easy. If you'd like the support of a sexual trauma therapist who has walked people through recovery, schedule a free consultation today.

We are not a crisis center and can’t respond to urgent requests. If you need immediate support after a sexual assault, contact RAINN.org